New for the Noughties 6

'Very superstitious' said Steve Wonder. 'Writing's on the wall.' And forgetting for the moment that it is wrong to write on walls and that is a problem to be solved by education not mumbo-jumbo, how do superstitions begin?

The song goes on, 'Ladder's 'bout to fall.' Which may be a good reason not to walk under it or an alarming lack of health and safety awareness by the wall-writer. Whatever. Presumably, once upon a time, someone had a stroke of good fortune whilst pulling a rabbit's foot from out of a sweep's black cat and the rest is mystery.

Today I found three Royal Mail elastic bands on the floor and had the good luck not to fall on a treacherous journey to the shops and back. It is only relatively recently that Royal Mail operatives have taken to saving us all the necessity ever to purchase a rubber band again which is what is new for the noughties by the way; tentative link I agree. I feel that I should honour this with a new superstition. Since we never see magpies any more then a Magpie-like (it was a short-lived TV programme rivalling Blue Peter) rhyme based on red bands is apposite:

One for enthusiasm
Two for pluck
Three for passion and
Four for good luck
Five for sarcasm
Six for cant
Seven for having a bit of a rant
Eight's for courtesy
Nine is rude
Ten is bingo oh don't be a prude

E la la lastic band
E la la lastic band

Let me know if it works.