Stopping

It is said that great three point sermons have seven points:

Introduction
Firstly
Secondly
Thirdly
Finally
Lastly
In Conclusion

I blame St Paul who often managed more than one 'finally brothers' and sometimes put 'finally' at about the half-way point of his letters.

I have heard preachers in the past who have written out their material carefully but feel they haven't been complete enough and try and add more after their script has finished. They are like sermons with no brakes. Once you go off-script the only way to stop is to drive the thing into a tree. The sudden halt. Tony Blair did it with his last Prime Minister's Question Time. After all his House of Commons erudition he finished with, 'That's it; the end.'

So a recent, excellent sermon I heard had 'finally' at about the 75% mark, followed by a new point. Then we heard the expression '...my last two points' followed by the promise of a 'final slide.' This was immediately followed by 'Before I put up the final slide' and a brief comment, then a slide with four questions on it.

A useful preparation point for public speakers is that the last thing you intend to say should be the first thing you write. It will summarise your whole talk and therefore you need to know what it is going to be before you start. The first thing you say should be a brief link from what has happened so far. Your first sentence should be written, if only in your head, in the five minutes before you speak.

Your Favourite Subject

OK, in five minutes time you have to get up and talk to an audience for twenty minutes. That's all you know. Some will be terrified; others will take to it like a stroll in a park.

What you gonna talk about?

I thought about this yesterday when a newly ordained acquaintance put on Facebook that he had to preach his second sermon in his new parish this coming weekend and he could choose any subject he liked and what did we think he should choose? I repent of my slightly graceless answer which was not to ask everyone on Facebook until he had a harder question.

But it is interesting how many people, be they in Defence Procurement, Horticulture or Nursing, in professions that do not require the regular delivery of stand-up anything, stumble at the problem of what to speak about if asked to speak.

You see there is one subject in which you, whoever you are, are the world's leading expert. One topic about which you can speak without fear of contradiction. One diatribe that will be the best it could possibly be.

Yet many people miss it.

I thought about this again just now when I was looking through a book of new children's songs and found the old children's song I Am Fearfully and Wonderfully Made.

The topic? It's you. If asked to speak about anything talk about you. If you need help get interviewed. If you have no interviewer available give out pieces of paper and ask the audience to state something they would be interested to know about you.

You are the best you there is. Tell people about that.

When to Stop

Less is more. As one who is beginning to embrace minimalism, this is my mantra. It works in so many areas of life. I have spoken to a number of artists who have ruined good pictures with one further brush stroke. Shop windows have too many goods on display (in Japan a big shoe shop may have a single pair in the window). Parish ministry requires fewer interventions than you imagine. Priests can over-rate their self-importance.

One technique which would be much blessed by less is speaking. Not just shorter talks, although I am writing this during quite a long talk of which more later, but conversation.

How many times have I been engaged in a chat with someone who has responded to a point, then made another, then changed the subject then told a related story until it is almost impossible to get back to the thing you were interested in discussing in the first place. Hi Mum, by the way. I recently had a colleague who had the capacity to make an interesting story so dull through excessive length that only some hours later did I realise I had been amused.

Now to this long talk. There is a peculiar sensation one feels when listening to a speaker who does not know how to bring their presentation to an end. It is like watching the driver of a car with failed brakes working out that they are going to have to use a hedgerow to bring their pride and joy to a halt. That driver will always consider that there may be an easier stopping place round the next bend; this speaker is constantly convinced that the next story, the fifth since suggesting all was finished, will be a softer landing. Notes have been placed, closed on the table. We have got to questions. One more dab of paint for perfection. Damn.

Note to speakers. Write the end first. Write the end of the end first of all. That is what you wanted to talk about. Say nothing, nothing at all, after that. It is the presentation skills equivalent of checking your brakes.

Annoying Adverts 3

Do you know the TV advert for the Nationwide? It features an overweight bank manager from an imaginary competitor who teases, lies and suggests that his rate of interest is like a piece of bait to reel in the customer. His picture is in the window of Nationwide branches.

It's annoying because it breaks the first rule of visual aids. Don't put up a picture of something you want to say is wrong. You end up reinforcing the negative image.

Your visual aids should add emphasis to the 5% of your presentation you want people to remember without fail.

Nationwide. They have fat managers who put fish-hooks through their customers' lips, don't they? Or did I remember it wrong?