After eighteen months of grubbiness we finally found a window cleaner and, since he has been today and done a good job, I'm happy to publicise Shorland Window Cleaning services on 07515 726576.
Ross Shorland specialises in cleaning leaded (remember we are still mocking the Tudors here) and inaccessible windows over conservatories by using a high-pressure water jet system. He straps on a back-pack, looking like he is about to take off using a jet thruster. Direct resemblances to 007 end at this point since he removes grime not enemy agents.
I met Ross and his colleague Elliott Tweedy (great name) who is also a transparent wall maintenance engineer - using more conventional methods - the other day and got chatting to them. To be fair they got chatting to me and showed more of an interest in my life than tradespeople usually do. When it got to the 'What do you do?' question (at which point 'vicar' normally shuts up all but the most committed chatterers) they explained that they were Jehovah's Witnesses. They owned up to the fact that they were encouraged to take jobs that put them in touch with the general public as a better technique for evangelism than door-to-door work. Good for them. Respect.