Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Lithp

It wath a latté, latht week. Nothing thpethial, jutht an ordinary latté to go. It wath in a plathtithithed cup with a moulded lid and a little thpout. The milk wath foamy and cooled quickly. The hot, dreamy coffee flowed through it and wath ath hot ath the very fireth of hell when Thatan cometh back from hith break and addth ekthtra logth or thummat.

I thought I had got away with it. A week went by. Nothing. A week and a half. All well. But eating my meal on Monday night I got the angle right, or maybe wrong (I will have to type an eth thoon, ah there we go) and the new ulther on the end of my tongue awoke and thent needleth thtabbing into the nerve endingth.

Tho friendth, an Alpha Guetht Thupper talk trying to avoid the letter eth. Can't be done. Jethuth ith a bit of a problem thee. And today. By jingo every letter eth or thimilar thound thtabth abd thtabth abd thtabth.

Tomorrow ith a quiet day. I will be very thtill and thilent and the input will be brief. Thtop laughing. You're all rotten bathtardth.

Dithable thpell-checker.

5 comments:

Jonathan Potts said...

Nasty little blighters those mouth ulcers - have rather a disposition towards them myself. Best thing for it is Adcortyl-in-orobase. It's about a fiver for 4 grammes or something ridiculous - but well worth it. Bonjella's just a waste of time (quite tasty though).

On the bright side - you've found somewhere that serves latte's that aren't horribly luke-warm. That's a rare thing these days.

Jonathan Potts said...

latte's ????

Apologies - what is wrong with my grammar these days???

Cosmo said...

Ah, the scourge of scalding lattes. Technically, you get a better flavour of coffee when it's just nicely warm. Of course, you get no flavour at all if your tastebuds have been boiled away.

Nice post. It must have taken ages to write!

Mike Peatman said...

You met your Shibboleth, then?

Anonymous said...

You'll not be singing "Blessed Assurance" this week then...

Gill H