Tuesday, March 28, 2006

Management Jargon

The cartoon in the Independent media section yesterday was about some media types trying to come up with new management jargon. In the same section a glossy women's magazine editor was described as someone who 'gave good shoe.' I think, as someone once said, that I may have to retire as a satirist due to the unfair competition from reality. Nevertheless here's some new, and free, management jargon for you to try. I believe that these are original. Let me know if someone else deserves the gobbledecredit:

· We're looking for the 58th variety
· The snowdrops and daffodils never overlap
· Don't try and put anything after the blessing
· Let's put the telescope to a good eye this time
· You don't need to ban smoking in a refinery
· He's Sascod out
· He went to the festival but his tent blew away
· She arrived with insufficient postage
· The fjord iced over before his long-ship got back
· She's playing in the key of H
· Just another speed bump in life's traffic calming system
· This strategic thinking needs a congestion charge
· Lets take that idea to the charity shop and buy a new one
· He got on the agenda but as any other business
· He couldn't buy a burger in McDonalds

4 comments:

Martin said...

If I was being pedantic, I would point out that it is perfectly valid to play in the Key of H, as long as you are German. This is equivalent our B - Their B is equivalent to our Bb (B flat). There is actually an organ piece "Prelude and Fugue for Organ on B-A-C-H" by Franz Liszt. You can listen to a sample of it here.

Steve Tilley said...

If you were being pedantic, Martin. If?

Martin said...

Well, that's what you said Sunday, if.

Mike Peatman said...

* Retraining her isn't on, it's a hardware problem
* His wardrobe requires a reprioritisation strategy