Sexist Guff

How female are you? Answer yes or no unless otherwise indicated.

1. Can you quickly name an issue you can deal with personally and privately without involving anyone else in discussion? (yes = 1 point; no = 0)

2. What is the time to the nearest ten minutes (you may not look at a watch or clock until after you have guessed)? (successfully guessed = 1 point; failed = 0; looked at watch before finishing reading instructions = 1)

3. Point east. (successfully identified = 1 point; failed, or don't know how to check = 0)

4. Can you say what you want for supper immediately? (yes = 1 point; no = 0)

5. Do you take a box of tissues to the cinema ? (yes = 0 points; no = 1)

6. Do you know what your correct tyre pressures are? (yes = 1 point; no = 0)

7. Are you finding this funny so far? (yes = 1 point; no = 0)

8. Are your CDs/records/tapes in some sort of order? (yes = 1 point; no = 0; tasteful order based on colour of sleeve = 0)

9. Without looking, do you know what sort of shoes the nearest woman is wearing? (yes = 0 points; no = 1 point; sexy, strappy high-heels over a shapely ankle = 1)

10. In what circumstances might you shout ‘offside?’ (never = no points; any other circumstances = 1 point)


Score 0 Yes, you are definitely a woman
Score 1-3 You may be a woman or simply very in touch with your feminine side
Score 4-6 You are probably a man but you have let things slip a bit recently
Score 7-9 Beer?
Score 10 Offside surely

Lack of heterosexuality may bias the results