Friday, October 28, 2005

Campaign for Real Liturgy (CRL)

Have been a member of the CRL since Bob taught me:

Minister: The Lord is here.
People: Ay up he's started.

Which I published in full in Drama Verses Sketches (CPAS 1999) page 38.

I now formally induct Jo Barfoot into the CRL for this effort (when she should have been working or moving house or both).

This is the North London version of the Confession:

Minister: Merciful Lord, we confess that we have failed you.
Congregation: An' you gotta problem wiv dat?

Minister: God says: Yeah, I gotta problem wiv dat. You people fink you so clever, just look at the mess you making ovit.
Congregation: Sorry, innit

Minister: We confess that we have sinned against our neighbour.
Congregation: Yeah, bu' you don' know what she like.

Minister: God says: Course I know what she like. I'm God, innit? You gottago and sor' i' ou'
Congregation: Sorry, innit.

More like this please.

1 comment:

holyphil said...

I always liked the alternative opening to the communion service:

Minister: Lift up your hearts
Congregation: Up yours also