You've probably seen the card before. It says:
How to please a woman?
love her, die for her, take her to dinner, miss the football for her, buy her jewellery, be interested in what she has to say...
How to please a man?
show up naked, bring beer...
I don't know who wrote this originally but on the card I received the punctuation was poor. It is credited to urban graphic although I don't know if that is Mr or Ms Graphic.
Apart from my personal preference for my beer-drinking female friend to at least start with some clothes on, I'd like to suggest one teensy flaw in this argument. You should not have 'die for her' second on the list. Unless she wants to buy her own jewellery.