You know what I really want? This is just between you and me right? What I really, really want is to (and tempting as it would be to now say zig a zig aah, I'll resist) be the minister of the best church for miles and miles. A church where people drop in (parties of 50 or more needing to book) to observe examples of good practice and get a fine cup of free coffee (much improved since Costa got the Diocesan post-church contract, thanks Mike for the original idea).
A church where the outstanding teaching (not by me, obviously, see comment on this post from recently deceased person), heart-lifting worship, dramatic supernatural interventions and free food have made Trendlewood a place where to not belong to the Jesus-following community is slightly odd.
A church where the outstanding minds from a number of agencies, who happen to live here, get together over a drink regularly and put the world to right, not just with words but with reality. Their conversation becomes action; lives are changed around the world because of the influence of this brainstorming community.
A church where the recent outpouring of generosity led to twice as much money as was necessary being promised towards the new building project as a result of which two new churches were also built on less fortunate estates.
A church which provides the finances to improve local surgeries, attract new businesses to town and sponsor a football team now rising rapidly towards the higher leagues the players with smaller chests proudly boasting they are aided by endlewood chur.
A church whose ordinands are wooed by theological colleges, whose curates are expected to take substantial responsibility immediately they leave and whose missionaries only have to set foot elsewhere to start major outpourings of grace and mercy.
I know, I know. Carlsberg don't run churches. But if they did...