Conversations with someone

Someone I know pretty well sent me an e-poster. I loved the poster but could make no sense whatsoever of the conversation with this person's colleague that was also part of the email. It began:

Ooomanga

Which received the reply:

Have you fallen a marklar yet?

And continued:

Please make this week super punch and roundhouse week. You know she will volunteer 1st before she even knows that she will be the punch bag/roundhouse guinea pig. Trust me if you do not do it, I will, and probably in the middle of the office. Work is poopy par parp!

So I asked. I had to, even though it involved showing my age:

Please provide a translation. Did a girl get hurt? Should I tell the police it was your idea?

I was particularly enthusiastic to know what:

...ooonanga.chapitout lefemme? Baboushka mamma...

(from another part of the email) meant.

I deserved it. Reply follows:

Fair point. Me and P speak a kind of hybrid language, part French & part alien. Ooonanga should be pronounced U Marga and stems from the time that M, a French guy who works here came to see our manager. Manager wasn't there, so I advised him that said manager would be back to her desk in 30 mins and also that I would leave a message if he needed. He said, 'Can you get her to call me, it's M.' But I heard 'U Maraga!' U Maraga has now become a form of salutation + a whole lot more!

Chapitout is a kind of French and doesn't really mean anything. Marklar is a useful word from South Park (Aliens episode) where the Aliens swap every noun, pronoun, adjective and verb with Marklar. I.e. my marklar is marklar in the marklar marklar = my finger is stuck in the plug hole.

The rest is b*llocks.

Don't worry about the girl. She didn't become the roundhouse guinea pig... P is a kick boxer and has recently started training nights up. Some of the people from work have been going including a particularily annoying girl. She must have been especially annoying that day, thus the e-mail.

Dontcha just love that expression, 'The rest is b*llocks.' The rest?

Now marklar marklaring and marklar on with the marklar or Marklar will be marklar when she marklars marklar from marklar. I have a new weapon of blog confidentiality and can be freely rude to all and sundry.