Thursday, December 08, 2005

Mustard News

A new heading as MSS will occasionally bring you extracts from the news which you may have missed. It will also make connections in ways you couldn't possibly imagine.

David Cameron, for instance, was not alive when England last won the football World Cup. Indeed every candidate for the top Shadow Cabinet posts apart from David Davis is younger than me.

If David Willetts gets the job people are tipping him for then two guys from the year below me at school will be Chief Master of the old school and Secretary of State for Education. I think my year under-achieved.

Druids of the Mistletoe Foundation have blessed the market of the new crop in Tenbury Wells. Mistletoe is a highly favoured crop amongst druids because it never touches the ground and takes no nourishment from the earth. Druids believe this is a good thing.

Wayne Rooney likes lettuce a lot according to his girlfriend.

Conclusion. Feed Wayne Rooney mistletoe and vote labour and we may well win the World Cup.

Or not. This was not nearly as amusing as it looked like it was going to be when I embarked upon it. I need more practice. Will post this so you will be able to see how much I have improved when I have improved.


Martin said...

Just for the sake of needless complication's sake. I don't think the druids have thought it through. The mistletoe with sap nuitrients from the tree. This means that the tree will get more nutrients from the ground to support its growth. Therefore the mistletoe indirectly takes nourisment from the earth.

Ali Campbell said...

I don't think anyone cares Martin!