Bird Flu

As both my poets dropped out last night I did another challenge. Here is the result. A poem about Bird Flu to include:

Tamiflu
Plonker
Triangulate
Radiator
Brad Pitt
Carburettor
Volleyball
Bling
Mince Pies
Mulled Wine

I was minding my own business
Watching TV nothing much
Just Brazilian women playing volleyball
When the bell rang so I logged off
Cleared the memory pretty quick
And I headed off to find out who did call

At the front door - here's the thing
Was a tall man - oh the bling
He had goldie looking chains and piercing eyes
So I thought he should come in
And I offered him a gin
And as Christmas beckoned also some mince pies

He looked sad when I had cupped it
So perhaps I should have upped it
To a meal or something he would feel was fine
Finest food I will remit
(Not that he looked like Brad Pitt)
So the gin went and I offered him mulled wine

As he sat and chatted later
Sitting by the radiator
I perchanced to notice as he breathed he wheezed
And before I had thought better
Faster than a carburettor
He leaned over, looked at me and then he sneezed

Is it influenza caught
Or another virus ought
I to think and go to bed oh what to do?
I'm a gonner; I'm foreclosing
On flu remedies over-dosing
I think I've just been given tamiflu

Now I think it's getting late
But if I triangulate
I can work out why his mucus hit my conker
He had aimed at me in wrath
Made me ill and made me cough
Gave me bird flu out of vengeance what a plonker

Please would some real poets come to the next Cafe. We need some non-disposable poetry.