It is 7.55 a.m. and St enters the dairy room.
Hello BB what is that cow doing there?
You came into the dairy room by mistake. You need the diary room next door. And don't be so clever clever about writing your misprints into the script. Just correct them like grown-ups do.
Ooooh get you (lifts imaginary handbag to chin).
So what has today in store?
Today is a pre-advent quiet morning wth my colleagues on the St Paul's staff. We are going to a retreat house a few miles away to read and think and pray.
What are you going to read?
You knew that was bothering me didn't you? I've got the next two chapters of A New Kind of Christian to read again. I might look at a philosophical problem in 'The Pig that Wants to be Eaten' and I might read a few chapters of 'The Authentic Gospel of Jesus' by Vermes.
Are you going to be quiet?
Not if you keep asking me questions.
While you are away?
Some days I am and some I aren't. We'll see. I like to be the centre of attention without anyone noticing.
Is that one of your philosophical problems?
Anyway I meant are you going to spend any time just listening for the voice of the one who made you.
Would the Bible help here?
Traditionally yes, but there might be a still small voice whispering.
Tell it to speak up I'm getting a bit mutton.
I think it's telling you that most of the problems in your life would be sorted if you were more willing to make telephone calls.
How deliciously random.
Think about it.
So I woke up this morning, sat down at the computer and gave myself a tough time being grilled by an imaginary friend.
That's about the breadth of it.
Not normal is it?
Not in my experience, but then I'm only your imaginary friend, no-one else's. There isn't a place where imaginary friends go to compare notes and exchange training tips.
Ought to be.
Perhaps it's a story line.
Nice one. Thanks.