A Funny Thing Happened on the A46

My neighbours had lost their cat, Ollie. I only know its name because they had leafleted us all asking us to look in our sheds.

Driving home the other morning I parked on the drive and noticed neighbour and daughter walking around with a cat on a lead.

'You got Ollie back then?'

'Yes.'

Ollie avoided eye contact. Probably shame.

Nobody knows where Ollie had been but he returned after a couple of days. We once lost a cat for four months until we saw her in the pub car park opposite, begging fried chicken and fish from the garden customers. She came home in the winter.

That's enough about cats for a piece that is about cars. Only one thing happens to cats on the A46.

So I was distracted by Ollie on a lead, the ultimate feline indignity. Not likely, I reckon, to endear him to his adopted family. Which is how I came to shut the car boot on the handle of a bag for life. Annoying. I pressed the key fob again and the boot unlocked and immediately locked again. The handle was doing something to the system.

My car is a VW T-Roc convertible. It has two doors only. The rear seats do tip forward to allow enough space to take a Christmas tree to the tip though. And where is the catch to release the rear seats? You're way ahead aren't you?

I guessed this must have happened before. And yes, there is a section in the manual on it.

Half way down the driver's door pillar is a rubber bung, covering a hole (see illustration). Usually these bungs are used to fill in a gap caused by 'features not available on this model'. But lo, not here. Removing the bung (screwdriver needed) revealed it was attached to two pieces of stout cord the pulling of which would 'release the rear seats'. I did and it did. Well, half did. The driver's side seat released. I checked that the manual said 'both' and it did. I pulled again on the cords, a bit firmer, but nothing happened. But there was a gap into the boot that someone familiar with caving might access. I did a bit of caving thirty years ago before 'bulge at L5 and L6' calmed my sporting career down a bit. Slowly and tentatively, iPhone torch in hand, I squirmed into the boot.

I found the catch to release the boot lid and then squirmed back to get the (screwdriver needed) again. This worked but it relocked as soon as I removed the screwdriver.

I resquirmed and asked a friend for help. OK, wife.

'What do you want me to do?'

'Open the car boot.'

'Sounds like there's a catch.' (Would have made a good punchline but we have a few sentences to go.)

'There is. I'll be in it.'

This time I went extra slowly and carefully, remembering the tools. And the boot was opened. And I got out with all the tools and the mangled bag. And my back is fine thanks for asking.

This story is told in case it ever helps.

You may have forgotten the title. The next day I was driving along the A46 when the rear passenger-side seat dropped forward.